New Book Turns Cleaning Into a Family Fun Responsibility Lesson

If you're sick of being the person who does all the cleaning, without getting help from your spouse, and putting up with children who think you're their personal maid, then Team Clean is the book for you. Carol Paul knows all about teamwork, having spent more than twenty years involved in her father Coach Wooten's basketball camps. And she knows what it is to have family members not behave like team players. For years, she tried to keep the house clean on her own, and she tried hiring maids, only to have to clean before they came. Tired of this situation, she realized if a maid service could clean her house in an hour or two a week, there was no reason why her family of six could not do the same.

And so the Team Clean formula was born. I don't want to reveal all of Carol's secrets for how to get your spouse and children to help you clean, and more than clean, enjoy it as part of a regular weekly activity. I don't want to reveal the secrets because I really believe you will not only benefit from reading this book, but you'll enjoy it yourself. For the cover price of $19.95 and the few hours it will take you to read this book and implement Carol's plan, you will obtain a return on your investment that far surpasses anything the stock market or any financial guru could ever promise you. Carol's husband Steve, her co-founder of Team Clean, has estimated that: "If you have two children, three years apart, and they move out when they are eighteen years old, and you run Team Clean instead of paying for weekly cleanings, you could save $210,000 in those twenty-one years of raising the two of them!" And while that savings alone is phenomenal, you can't put a price on how turning cleaning into an activity that allows the family to spend time together will benefit your family, leading to bonding with your children that will keep most of those rebellious teen issues from occurring when they are older.

I know you're thinking, "Really-children who want to clean and teenagers who bond with their parents?" I know-I wouldn't have believed it either, but that's why Carol asked her four children, now teenagers and adults, to give their unedited opinions about Team Clean in this book. Not only are they wholly supportive of Team Clean, but they went off to college, shocked that their roommates didn't know how to clean, and they even come home every week still to participate. In fact, her college-age son Bucky says, "Even if I am not at home, I will usually find a way to get home for it. I will find myself road biking a few towns over just to make it back to Team Clean." Heck, Carol's kids have even had their friends want to come over and clean because of the fun and the rewards that come with it.

I won't get into the rewards, other than to say they are simple and easily put into practice. Carol sets some very clear guidelines around setting up Team Clean as a family activity, including the rewards part. She even goes into examples of what not to do. She applies common sense everywhere, foreseeing issues and emphasizing the importance of sticking to the guidelines.

Beyond the value of family interaction (teamwork), Carol offers detailed explanations of how to divide up the cleaning so it is appropriate to age groups-even two year olds can get involved, and not as a form of child labor, but so they feel important, part of the family, and are able to build their self-esteem through their contributions. Carol also includes charts to show how to delegate activities, and she provides details for each room of the house for what is to be cleaned.

In addition, this book is simply a lot of fun to read. It's filled with comical drawings, inspirational quotes, testimonials from people who have participated in Team Clean, and a frequently asked questions section based on comments Carol has already received from people who have implemented Team Clean.

More than anything, what stands out about this book is the teamwork. This is not a book that shows Mom the tricks of keeping the house clean on her own. It's not even about making your kids cooperate. It's about establishing a family tradition that will keep the family ties strong. In fact, this simple family tradition has led to the teaching of life lessons for her children. Carol provides a whole list of those lessons in the book, including "Taking ownership of a responsibility," "Learn to go to work on days even when you don't really feel like it," "Learn negotiating skills," and "Learn a good work ethic, not just to punch a clock."

Team Clean is going to change your family's life. In fact, it is a testament to the value of family activities. Not only will Mom get a cleaner house, but Dad will bond with his children, and children will grow up being responsible, secure, and ready to take on life as adults. Buy this book, implement its formula, and get ready for a fun life-changing experience!

A Book Review: Disconnected - Parenting Teens in a MySpace World by Chap Clark and Dee Clark

In this book, the Clarks address the issue of parenting teens in the 21st century. Like in Chap Clark's book, Hurt 2.0, they describe in-depth the development and characteristics of early, mid and late adolescence. This book is written from a Christian perspective using Scripture freely and presenting solutions from a Biblical perspective. Our authors direct this book to Christian parents.

This book follows the first edition of Hurt (2004) and precedes Hurt 2.0 (2011) which were directed at school and community workers. This Baker book publication was published in 2007.

Chap Clark teaches youth, family and culture at Fuller Theological Seminary, is president of ParenTeen Seminars, Senior editor of" Youthworker Journal" and author of more than fifteen books. His wife, Dee Clark is a family therapist and coauthor of two other books. Together, they have raised three children into young adulthood.

In Part One - Understanding Today's Adolescent Journey, the Clarks address how the journey has changed since we were teenagers. Early in the 20th century, there were children and adults. By the middle of the century the transition between children and adults was no more than five years. Today teens endure a transition that lasts as long as 15 years or more. While many adults of our day have a hard time recognizing the difference, the Clarks make the case that as a society our youth suffer from "systemic abandonment". By "systemic abandonment", they mean that parents spend more money on things and spend more time taking children to events, but do not spend quality time with their children. Chap and Dee say that we "have led our children into an environment where they have never been more ill-equipped to handle the world we have handed them." P. 72

Adolescents have three tasks to perform as a part of "Individuation"- answering these questions: Who am I? What power do I really have? Where do I fit? According to social scientists, adolescence begins with the average age of puberty in a community (biology) and ends when they have achieved "individuation" (culture). Pre 1900 puberty averaged at age 14+ and individuation occurred at age 16. In 1980 puberty averaged at age 13 and individuation occurred at age 18. Finally, in 2007 the average age of puberty was 12 and individuation occurred in the mid-20s. p. 63 Now, puberty may begin as early as 11 years old.

Part Two - Parenting Through the Seasons explores different seasons of life. Quoting Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 the authors make the point that there are different seasons in the lives of our children. Our authors indicate that parents have five tasks: understanding, showing compassion, "boundarying," charting/guiding and launching into adulthood. In four successive chapters they present childhood, early adolescence (middle school), mid-adolescence (high school) and late adolescence (young or emerging adults). They present an illustration of the process in the form of a tight rope; childhood and adulthood are on either side (dependence and interdependence) while adolescence is a long tightrope where they are alone to work on the tasks of individuation (independence). During that time these teens need family stability and safety which includes a home where the parents are in charge and, they add, a home that is fun.

Mid-adolescents respond to abandonment by forming their own "underground family" with their friends. Chap and Dee spend a chapter contrasting what teens say, how parents interpret it and what the teens really mean. I am a bit hesitant to endorse this entire chapter, but what I do take away from this chapter is that we need to listen to our young people and continue the conversation to ascertain what they really mean. They may not even know what they mean.

Finally in the last chapter, the Clarks discuss their model of successful parenting - Parenting As Partnership - The Three Levels of Partnership. Using 1 Corinthians 12:27, they recognize that as Christians, parents are a part of the Body of Christ. As an individual we "partner with Christ"; as a couple we "partner with our spouse - both of whom are personally "partnering with Christ". When children arrive in the home the next level of partnership appears. Finally, they recommend forming a group of families who are accountable to each other and have a loving interest in all the members of the group. This is how they see parenting children "taking a village." When Chap referenced this in Hurt 2.0, I was a bit hesitant because Hurt and Hurt 2.0 were directed at the community and schools. However, in this book, addressing the parents who have the option of including or excluding other families in their level of partnership, I am more comfortable with this idea as it is based on Scriptural principles. He called these other individuals / families "soulmates" and emphasizes that they are "soulmates" of both spouses, not just one of them. They conclude with the following:

1. "Each parent must seek to know, love, and follow Jesus Christ.

2. Both parents must be a cohesive and impenetrable unit of strength and love.

3. The family must be surrounded by intimate friends in community, or soul mates and

4. Single parent families need soul mates." P. 192-193

My concerns regarding how Dr. Clark viewed family and church (review of Hurt 2.0) have been largely relieved. In addition to addressing Christian parents in Disconnected, he has taken this model to the community and school leaders in the form of the 5:1 project - five adults in a positive relationship with each teen( http://www.parenteen.org ). Certainly in a Christian context, we have more reason to believe that God will be pleased to bless our efforts, and yet salvation is of the Lord. Also, the Clarks have spent some time with the cause and have put forth some practical ways that can help parents, especially Christian parents, to establish a home that nurtures our young.

Maggie Dail offers online services through the Center for Neuro Development and Family Academy Online. She and her husband, Ronnie, make their home in Bartlesville, Oklahoma. The Center is affiliated with Academy Northwest and Family Academy. They home schooled two foster sons and have worked with home schooling families for over 20 years. Maggie earned her M.A. in Special Education in 1989 and has taught for nearly 40 years.

Homeschool and neurodevelopmental assessments, brain training and other services - by Skype / Phone / E-mail - http://www.centerforneurodevelopment.com

Academy Northwest is a state approved private extension program for homeschoolers and accredited by the Northwest Accreditation Commission. Family Academy offers an online parent course: Able to Teach